Dealing with the harrowing consequences of bullying

“The values to teach them – value yourself; never let anybody look down on you; never be afraid of anybody; if they come and say ‘ you’re fat’, then you turn and say ‘being fat is beautiful."

Dealing with the harrowing consequences of bullying

Dealing with the harrowing consequences of bullying By Lilian U. Okoro

Ochii Awata, 9, would always come home withdrawn and unwilling to talk about activities at school. It became more worrisome every morning when she refused to get ready for school.

With much persuasion and assurance, her mother made her open up and she narrated how some classmates would always taunted, called her names and pulled her hair.

Her mother went to the school and reported, it was investigated and the offenders were reprimanded.

In a related but unfortunate incident, Sylvester-Oromoni Jnr was bullied by his peers in school, which resulted to some health –related issues that led to his demise.

The American Psychological Association (ASA) says bullying is aggressive physical contact, words or actions to cause another person injury or discomfort.

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It is with the intention to hurt that person physically or emotionally. Bullying behaviour that can make people feel hurt, threatened, frightened and left out and it can happen face-to-face and online.

It is a common and serious issue that significantly affects various settings worldwide, being more prevalent in schools, but also at workplace environments.

Mr Zach Praise worked in an organisation where he said he was regularly bullied by his senior colleague.

According to him, his many complaints to management were not addressed. With time, he became withdrawn and refused to mingle with his colleagues. A highflyer, his confidence started going down and his output plunged.

Noticing the changes, he resolved to change the situation by leaving the toxic environment. He got an even better job with good workplace policies.

He said he was happier at the new place and his productivity had been soaring.

Dealing with the harrowing consequences of bullyingBullying at workplace include abusing or threatening to abuse an employee, spreading rumors or gossiping, repeated unreasonable towards another worker or group of workers and behaving aggressively towards others.

It involves unreasonable work demands, excluding someone from work-related events, pressuring someone to behave inappropriately as well as teasing or playing practical jokes

Highlighting the effects of bullying, some mental health professionals, said that bullying could result in enormous physical and psychological consequences on the life of the person being bullied, which could last far beyond childhood to adulthood.

The professionals decried the prevalence of bullying at schools and homes, as the effects in most cases results to negative outcomes.

According to them, both the perpetrator and the bullied are to be examined for the psychological and physical impacts of the bullying.

Dr Olugbenga Owoeye, Chief Medical Director, Federal Neuro-psychiatric hospital Yaba , identified various forms of bullying to include physical, verbal, social, sexual and internet or cyber bullying.

He said that bullying could have longtime psychological consequences on individual’s mental health well into adulthood.

On the psychological consequences, Owoeye identified that they include depression, anxiety, use of drugs, trouble sleeping, difficulty concentrating and increased risk of suicidal thoughts and behaviours.

He added that bullying could result in acute stress reaction, post-traumatic disorder and invasive head injury that might present with various mental health conditions.

He decried the prevalence of bullying in society – mostly in schools, at homes and in the offices, saying that a lot of factors were responsible for it.

On the physical consequences, Owoeye said that bullying might result in injuries, wounds and fractions, stressing that bullying might even result to death.

“Bullying has quite enormous physical, psychological and mental health consequences, ranging from depression, anxiety, drug abuse, fractions, injuries and low self-esteem among others.

“Apart from that, there can be an invasive head injury that may present with various mental health conditions.

“If the bullying is too much and the person is not taken care of, the self-esteem could be damaged, as a result of this, the person may develop depression.

“The person may go into substance abuse in order to be able to cope; so the child could go into drug abuse or try to join a cult group to be able to cope with incessant bullying in the school or the person may equally become so bad that he himself will become a bully.

“And then, the circle continues; because you can make a bully out of the person being bullied; because after sometimes the person may say ‘well, since this behaviour is permitted, let me too begin to exhibit it,” Owoeye said.

Proffering some measures to curb the menace of bullying in the society, Owoeye recommended massive education campaigns to educate people on the consequences of bullying.

According to him, with education and awareness campaigns, people will be well informed about the negative impacts of bullying on their mental health and thereby refrain from the act.

The chief medical director emphasised the need for mental health education to be inculcated into the school curriculum; so that from there, children would learn more about the act.

He emphasised the need for the teachers, guardians and caregivers to pay more attention to the children and be more observant on their behaviours.

“There are lots of things to do to help prevent bullying in the society.

“Number one thing is education and creating awareness about bullying – that it is real – at homes, in the schools, in offices, on the internet and community level.

“Educate people that bullying can result in a lot of terrible consequences; so, when people know this, they will restrain themselves from bullying others.

“In addition to that, there is need for the teachers, caregivers and all those that take care of the children to really pay more attention to them and be observant.

“Another most important thing to do is to inculcate mental health education into school curriculum, so that from there they will be able to learn some of the things that can affect mental health like bullying’’.

Owoeye said there was also need for regular screening and clinical examination of the students to identify those with conduct disorders and treatment them accordingly.

He stressed need to sanction people for being involved in bullying to serve as deterrent to others.

“Similarly, regular screening and clinical examination of the students is very important because there might be some of these students with conduct disorders.

“As a result of it, they may bully others, they may steal other people’s things and before you know it, it will result in social and psychological consequences in the life of the person being bullied.

“And then, when you don’t reward the behaviour of bullying, that behaviour will stop; because behaviour/action go into extinct if that behaviour is not rewarded.

“For example, recently there was a school in Abuja where a girl was bullying another girl, and if that kind of person is sanctioned, she will not repeat such again.

“So, we can embark on behavioural modifications to be able to tackle the problem of bullying,” Owoeye said.

Dr Olufunmilayo Akinola, Head, Child and Adolescent Centre, Federal Neuro-psychiatric Hospital Oshodi Annex, harped on the role of parenting in addressing bullying behaviours.

She called on parents to rise to their responsibility and inculcate good morals, values and kindness in the children.

Akinola, also a consultant psychiatrist, said that by creating a loving home atmosphere and teaching children principles of respect, empathy, and kindness, parents could play a big part in preventing bullying in the society.

She said that parents should be able to teach their children good self-esteem and keep a close eye on their kids’ behaviour, keep lines of communication open because it’s important for parents to know about their children’s social interactions.

According to her, parents are very important in influencing how their children behave, saying that self-confidence and the ability to cope and interact should start from home.

“Prevention of bullying starts from homes; since everyone originates from a home, so, it behooves on the parent to teach and inculcate good morals, values and self-esteem on their children, who comes out to exhibit them, thereby shun bullying.

“Parents should be able to teach children how to stand on their own and not to fight unnecessarily. Teach them from home good self-esteem, self-confidence.

“The values to teach them – value yourself; never let anybody look down on you; never be afraid of anybody; if they come and say ‘ you’re fat’, then you turn and say ‘being fat is beautiful.

“ So, develop that self-esteem about yourself and if you think they are going to overpower you; then you should report.

“If you teach a child to be kind and polite to others; there is no way that child will come out and start to bully others.

“But how many families have a good home now?

“Parents are too busy these days; father is out looking for money, mother is out to make ends meet, and the children are behind their phones, iPad and social media.

“But, we are forgetting that by the time we have this money, what we will meet in our children the money may not be able to take care of it.

“So, let’s go back to our roots and spend time with our children, don’t leave the children with house helps that don’t know anything themselves; be intentional parents,” Akinola said.

Also, a Consultant Neuro-psychiatrist, Dr Maymunah Kadiri, highlighted government as an important instrument in preventing bullying in the society, particularly in schools.

Kadiri, also the Medical Director, Pinnacle Medical Services, Lagos, said that government was essential to establishing laws and policies geared toward prohibition of bullying and undesirable behaviours in schools, thereby, giving the students a secured and encouraging environment.

Kadiri said: “The policies should give specific definitions of bullying, clarify the duties of educational institutions, and set up protocols for reporting and handling cases.

“It is important that these rules require regular reporting of bullying incidences in order to maintain transparency and responsibility.

“This entails putting in place thorough anti-bullying guidelines in educational institutions and offering financings for successful intervention initiatives; schools should have sufficient resources to put anti-bullying programs into place, train personnel, and offer victims’ and offenders’ support services”.

Kadiri said that schools should play an important role in promoting a healthy, positive environment where difference is accepted and respect is a core value, as they are the major place where bullying frequently happens and thus consequences of bullying is often evident.

The Neuro-psychiatrist said that schools should set clear guidelines for dealing with bullying behaviours and help both victims and offenders.

According to her, efforts that are implemented across the entire school, such as peer mentorship programs, anti-bullying events, and cooperative learning activities, can help achieve this.

She said, “This can be accomplished by training staff members to recognise and handle bullying situations, providing support services, and encouraging a sense of community and belonging among students.

“Counseling and other forms of support should be provided by schools to both the bullied students and their offenders. These programs can assist victims in overcoming the psychological effects of bullying and offer support”.

Also suggesting ways to address bullying, Dr Taiwo Obindo, the President, Association of Psychiatrists in Nigeria (APN), emphasised the need for a psychotherapy examination of the bully to detect if there were some underlying psychological/mental health conditions.

Obindo, also a consultant psychiatrist, said that the diagnosis was important to determine the likely causes of the bullying act, saying that some of the bullying perpetrators probably must have had antisocial personality disorder or some level of trauma when they were growing up.

“Most of the bully are actually said to be weakling; if you confront them, they are cowards on the own; they are just deriving support and strength from people around them.

“So, they need psychotherapy diagnosis to know the cause of such (bullying) behaviour because some of them may probably have antisocial personality disorder or some level of trauma while growing up.

“Like in secondary school; senior did this to me, I must also do it to the next person, so they pass it down.

“Some, is that environment where they grew up – the father bullying the mother, so, they may have been abused even as a child.

“So, such person may grow up to become a bully and will need to be examined,” Obindo said.

The effects of bullying go beyond the moment, if one survives it. The consequences of bullying has long term  physical, psychological, emotional and social impacts. It also impacts the economy as it is only a healthy person that can be productive.

To curb the menace bullying in the society, the professionals recommend the collective efforts of all stakeholders – the government, parents, guardians, caregivers, schools, teachers and the general public.

They said everyone has a role to play in ensuring behavioural modifications needed to combat the problem of bullying in the society.

According to them, bullying is a complex problem in schools that is impacted by social, cultural, psychological and even economic factors, saying that, to address it and establish a secured and encouraging learning environment for all pupils, an integrated approach with the cooperation of parents, educators, government and policymakers is essential to not just end the consequences of bullying, but end bullying altogether.